a land far far away

WARNING: This post may be a bit sappy, & I apologize in advance

As a high schooler, nothing sounded better than going as far away from home as possible when it came to college. I wanted out of my town and frankly out of my home. I was a relatively good kid, but I felt like I needed much more independence than I had, so the choice to go to the University of South Carolina (over 1000 miles away from home) seemed like a no brainer.

I wanted to go to a school that no one else from my high school would go to; I wanted to make my way for myself unlike everyone else that I knew. It was not that I had anything against the people that I knew. I had some friends back home that I loved dearly and had known forever. My mindset was that I did not want to grow up, go to school, and end up living my whole life in one place.

I still really agree with my original thoughts, and I truthfully think that going away has made me a better person than I was when I left, but there have been some hardships. You don’t necessarily understand the full extent of not being close to home. When I thought of something that I needed from home, I had to wait for a break or have it be sent. When I was sick, there was no one in range that could help me or just take me home for the weekend. And when things just got rough, the hugs that I needed could only be given over the phone. I hate to sound sad & sappy, but that was the reality. But those things, although tough at times, were not the reason that I am writing about this today.

Winter break was a tipping point for me; I realized how hard being away had been. It is not like I hate my school or the people that I have met there, but it is what I am missing out on being away. My friends all stayed relatively close to home & can see each other much more frequently. My younger brother is growing up quicker than I want him too, & it is hard to be away from that.

As I left today to head back to school, I cried a lot. I try not to cry too often and I normally never cry in situations like these, but for the first time, something was pulling me back home. My heart is split in two between my dream school and my hometown & it is something that I never realized that would happen.

I do not write this to scare anyone into not going away to college, because it is still one of the best decisions that I have made. I share my feelings about this to remind people to think about and appreciate what they have. Don’t ever take for granted your friends and your family that you have around you because they are a large part of your world & who you are.